Consequences & Rewards

Today we will focus on some behavior modifications for adolescents. Behavior modification essentially means cultivating desired behaviors and changing undesirable ones by utilizing a system of rewards and consequences. We will go over examples of some of these to use, the caveat however is, each and every child, adolescent and teenager is different and individual, and these methods are generally devised on a case by case basis. You are the one who knows your child best, and will therefore be able to gauge which technique may work best within your family. A consultation with a professional: mental health counselor, school counselor, and others may be beneficial. 

Punishment vs. Consequences as a form of behavior modification: 

Consequences are the results of our decisions and actions and can be "good" or "bad." Consequences help us all grow and when children experience consequences for their actions, it can help them learn and grow, make better choices and learn from their mistakes. Consequences also give you a chance to parent from the perspective of principle rather than anger and frustration. 

Punishment on the hand does not respect the decision of the child, even if the decision or choice the child has made is wrong. It comes out of fear and anger, and generally looks towards a withdrawal of love which can be harmful to the relationship. This approach does not help children to develop ways in which to make decisions responsibly. 

The following two examples come from https://www.empoweringparents.com to better illustrate this concept: 

"Your 13-year-old doesn’t call to check-in and let you know where he is. In the past, his punishment was to lose his cell phone for a couple of days. Yes, that might have taught him that when you don’t act responsibly you can lose privileges.  But what it didn’t teach him is how to act more responsibly.  So how can using consequences make a difference here?

Take the same scenario, but before you decide how to respond first ask yourself:  What is it that I want him to learn and improve? You probably want him to learn to follow your instructions and do what he is told, which in this case was to call. You also want him to improve by consistently remembering to do it.  To motivate and guide your son to better behaviors, the consequence could be that he will only be allowed to go out with friends on the coming weekend and only for an hour.  During that time he must remember to call you and let you know where he is.  If he does this successfully both Saturday and Sunday, he can return to going out for longer periods of time.  What he’s learning is that privilege (going out with friends) comes with responsibility (calling to check-in).  What he’s getting is the chance to practice and demonstrate to you both is that he can be trusted to do as he’s supposed to.

Or maybe your daughter doesn’t do her assigned chores. What do you want her to learn and practice? A natural consequence may be that you do not feel the goodwill to take her shopping.  Instead, she is assigned extra jobs to help you out around the house.  From this she learns that when she doesn’t do her part, others may not have the time or interest to go out of their way for her. Having to help more around the house will let her practice doing her part and to appreciate that not meeting her responsibilities can cause problems for others."

Establishing short term goals towards long term behavior change: 

For instance, if your child/adolescent has been engaging in unsafe behaviors, driving under the influence of alcohol. It would be necessary to bar access to the car for a long stretch of time in order to create behavior change. 

"No driving privileges until house rules have consistently been followed for 3 months. This means no alcohol and no missing curfew for 3 months and then we discuss at the end of a successful 3 months the return of your driving privileges."

During the 3 months, establish more short term task oriented goals (steps in the right direction) so that the child has a consistent opportunity to show improvements and growth. 

Utilizing reward charts and positive reinforcements:

Behavior modification plans in children or teens might include using a reward chart to increase a certain behavior, such as doing homework or chores, and providing immediate positive attention when the child begins behaving appropriately or simply praising the child when he or she engages in desirable behavior.

 
Examples of child behavior modification plans which have rewards might include offering a return of a privilege for a reaching a certain goal, having an increase in allowance, and increase of a curfew time, etc.

The following is a great workbook for parents, it has a thorough overview of behavior modification techniques and also which techniques are more useful and which are not so. In addition, it gives great evidence of all the information that has been provided and research from which the information came from as well: From the USC Center for Work and Family Life


Parent's Tool Kit for Teens

Positive Parenting

Nothing can compare to being a parent, the highs, the lows and everything in between their own set of concerns so different from anything else ever experienced. Parenting, specifically positive parenting means all types of things for parents. However, generally, it means responding rather than reacting to our children. This week we bring you a few positive parenting tips!

It is all about the connection, be in a warm relationship - this will generate love, trust, cooperation, and many other aspects which aid in development. A healthy connection with your children can go miles in communicating with them.

Practice being calm - it will do wonders in not reacting to your children instead will aid in responding. This small act of mindfulness will also help in other arenas of your life. 

Say Yes to practice, and No to perfection. 

Fill your own cup - it is very difficult to pour towards others if your own cup is empty, take 10 minutes to yourself, even a whole day (if possible). It will become much easier to tend to your children, once your own needs are met.  

Lastly, there is no one way of practicing positive parenting, and it is a trial and error process. It will look different for all parents. Happy Parenting! 

A wonderful website with resources for parents: http://www.ahaparenting.com/ and some more great resources can also be found on one of our contributor's (Joanna Cortes-Agnello) website: http://www.joannacortesagnello.com/positive-parenting-resources.html

Run For Life

This week's post comes from McKenzie Ziegler. McKenzie is a Brooklyn College, CUNY student who has volunteered to share her essay written for college around overcoming depression. McKenzie is a Health and Nutrition Science major. 

Run For Life

Ever since I was 15 and I fell in love with long distance running, I wanted to run the NYC marathon. In 2014, the first full year I lived in NYC, I qualified for the 2015 marathon by running nine races and volunteering at another race. My times were improving until my knees started hurting at the end of the summer of 2014. Tight rubber bands seemed to surround my knee caps, stretching almost to the point of tearing, grinding my bones together, making my knees red-hot. By September they were so painful I had to cut my runs short. Running was my outlet for stress; without it the stress piled up. I tried everything I could to heal my knees, but nothing worked. Soon almost every run hurt, making me frustrated and discouraged. When I had run before my injury, I had felt free and alive. Running had become an anchor in my life and part of my identity; without it I felt lost.

I fell into depression, for a combination of reasons: lots of stress with college and work, being states away from family, a lack of friends and being unable to connect with people easily, relationship problems, an uncomfortable living situation, medical complications, a suppressed childhood trauma I struggled to understand, and, on top of all that, being unable to run. I assume I also got biologically unlucky. I had struggled with anxiety, unaware it even had a name, since early adolescence. Depression was new though. For me, depression was like a gloomy, dark gray storm cloud that would decide to show up even though the forecast called for clear, sunny skies. It threw off my emotions, to where they would often not fit the situation I was in, and my anxiety became more irrational. I would cry and worry for no reason. I felt like little people were inside my head, calling the shots, pulling on wires. Once positive and full of energy, I became easily irritable, overwhelmed, and tired. Once goal-oriented and ambitious, I would often have spells of emotional numbness and hopelessness. Some days were good, some were bad; most were me trying to understand what was going on and fearing it would get worse.

Depression is all lies. It's a friend who always hangs around and lies to you. You know it's a bad influence, but you have no control. Depression is in control. When you want to do things you always enjoyed, it tells you, you are too weak, you are no good, there is no point. I gradually lost interest in many things I always loved, including running. I simply lost motivation. I struggled to get out of bed in the morning and do simple tasks, like combing my hair or going to the grocery store. Everything felt like work. Depression tells you, there is nothing good in your life, you are a failure, nothing will ever get better. It lies to you and changes your perspective on life. It’s also isolating, convincing you, no one cares about you, no one understands you, everyone would be better off if you didn't exist. I was too ashamed to talk to people. I felt trapped and dead.

I remember walking home from school one day, and it took so much effort to put one foot in front of the other. My legs felt leaden. I thought, what is the point of even going on? What would happen if I collapsed right here on the sidewalk and gave up? It was a bright, sunny day, but I couldn’t see that; depression’s dark cloud was over top of me, overwhelming me. I did think of suicide, of walking out in front of that car, of going to the train station and jumping. But every time, I thought of my family and my boyfriend. I could never do that to them. They kept me going.

My depression worsened throughout 2015 even though things in my life were improving. However, I had already signed up for the marathon in November. A part of me was still my old goal-oriented self; there was no giving up on the race. I started training in the summer but didn’t feel motivated enough to run as many miles as recommended, so I focused more on the long training run and increased its distance every week. There were times during those long runs that I felt confident and joyful, but it didn’t last. I signed up for a few short races with my boyfriend for external motivation. Thankfully, my knees had healed. Although my training fell short and I was depressed, I felt prepared mentally to finish the marathon. In the back of my mind, I was hoping for a revelation during the race that would cure my depression.

The day of the NYC marathon arrived quickly, but I was eager to get it over with. On November 1, 2015, I woke up early in the morning after a night of little sleep, got dressed, and gathered my things. Two subway trains, one ferry, one bus, and a long walk later—a marathon in itself—I was at the start in Staten Island. The blue archway marking the start line and the daunting Verrazano-Narrows Bridge were staring me in the face. Among a large group of ponytails, running caps, windbreakers, and bright colors, I was a bundle of nerves and excitement. On one hand, I knew I’d have lots of fun; on the other hand, I knew pain was inevitable. I was ready to cross the finish line, and I was only toeing the start line. The gun blasted and I started running, soon stepping onto the bridge—a bridge that during training I viewed with fear and excitement, envisioning this moment.

I had always needed to listen to music while running, but the marathon was so exciting I never once put in my headphones. Surrounding me was a kaleidoscopic sea of 50,000 runners, all eyes set for the same finish. Two million spectators lined almost the entire 26.2 miles, cheering, holding up encouraging signs, and offering orange slices, wet sponges, and tissues. Bands were also strung along the course, their cheery beats pushing us along. It was electric. I’m running a marathon! and I can’t believe I’m doing this! crossed my mind many times. The first three miles flew by as I ran into Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. I knew my mom and my boyfriend would be at mile eight, in downtown Brooklyn, so I focused on running towards them. Soon I spotted my boyfriend, holding up a hot pink sign and two small American flags, and my mom, ringing a bell and taking pictures of me. They gave me the energy I needed to keep going.

I began to feel tired around mile ten, in south Williamsburg, Brooklyn, and started walking. The miles then seemed to come slower and slower, and my feet began to hurt. I kept pressing on, focusing only on the mile I was running. Water and Gatorade were available each mile; I found that by stopping to get a drink and walking a few minutes, I was able to continue running to the next water station. The crisp water and lemon-lime Gatorade were welcomed by my dry mouth; the short distraction was welcomed by my mind. My mom and my boyfriend cheered me on at mile sixteen in Manhattan, after I crossed the Queensboro Bridge. By mile 20, in the Bronx, I was looking for Central Park, where I knew the finish was. But I still had six miles to go! The roar of the crowd continued to encourage me, but I had to fight with myself to relax and run on. The balls of my feet were raw and I was nearing exhaustion.

Once I entered Central Park, between miles 22 and 23, I realized the rest of the course would be downhill. What a relief! Even still, the park was a blur—I was focused on getting to the finish. When I saw my mom and my boyfriend at mile 25, I barely had the energy to stop running and walk over to them. They encouraged me to keep going, and I did. In about fourteen minutes, I saw the blue archways of the finish. I can’t believe I did it! crossed my mind as I stepped over the blue and orange line. Flames raged on my feet, thighs, and hips. All I wanted to do was sit down, but I had to continue walking to get out of the park, meet my mom and my boyfriend, and then take the train home. As I limped I became irritated, thinking, this is worse than the entire marathon!

I never had a revelation during the marathon, and my depression persisted afterwards. I thought completing this great feat would change my point of view on life, or at least make me feel proud of myself, but it didn’t. I was only glad I got the marathon over with. I felt no joy; depression is that powerful. I became even more discouraged, and lost all motivation to run. In the back of my mind, though, I knew getting exercise was good for me, so I walked to and from school every day. I questioned my depression and fought back by challenging myself. I knew that someday, when I was ready, I would run again.

I ran for the first time since the marathon on April 24, 2016—almost six months later. The evening before, a thought that I hadn’t heard in a long time popped into my head: you should run tomorrow. The day was sunny and gorgeous, the temperature perfect for running. My boyfriend and I went to Prospect Park and ran the three-and-a-half mile loop, a path I have run many times. There’s no denying it—I was out of shape. We took many walk breaks, my throat burned with every inhale, and a cramp tightened my right side below my ribs. Nonetheless, it was great to once again feel my heart pounding, to have sweat tickle my nose, and to hear my labored breaths. I felt free, and I felt alive. I listened to the noises of the park and enjoyed being with nature. I was enjoying running again; it didn’t feel like work, as depression used to convince me it would. For that, I felt relieved. When we came to the big hill, I pushed myself to keep going: you are doing great, I am so proud of you. But I couldn’t make it all the way up, and we had to rest. Soon, though, I was able to sprint to the top. I never felt so happy running that loop as I did that day.

After a hill, things get easier. Running is a metaphor for life; some runs are easy, some are hard, but it is pushing through the hard that is most rewarding and which makes any following obstacle seem easier. The struggles of running a marathon or a steep hill, or being sidelined by a running injury are not unlike the struggle of coping with depression. I think running has instilled in me resilience and a fighting spirit, enabling me to overcome depression. In the same way many factors contributed to my fall into depression, more than one change was necessary to break free from depression’s hold. When the spring of 2016 brought new life to trees and flowers, a new perspective grew in me. I started feeling more calm and hopeful, confident and happy. I also became more appreciative of people who care about me—my biggest motivators. Depression may someday return, but I plan on running even when it tells me not to, as it is when I am running that I feel most alive.

Postpartum

Having a baby is a life changing experience no matter what. The emotions felt by the family can go from joy to anxiety to fear all in a small amount of time. It is a roller coaster of hormones and little sleep. It is no surprise that many moms feel overwhelmed and experience "baby-blues." However, some mothers may feel a longer lasting, more intense depression, known as PPD or postpartum depression. This condition is much more common than you may think: according to the Mayo Clinic, more than 3 million US cases per year.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, the following are the symptoms associated with Postpartum Depression:

• Feeling sad, hopeless, empty, or overwhelmed
• Crying more often than usual or for no apparent reason
• Worrying or feeling overly anxious
• Feeling moody, irritable, or restless
• Oversleeping, or being unable to sleep even when her baby is asleep
• Having trouble concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions
• Experiencing anger or rage
• Losing interest in activities that are usually enjoyable
• Suffering from physical aches and pains, including frequent headaches, stomach problems, and muscle pain
• Eating too little or too much
• Withdrawing from or avoiding friends and family
• Having trouble bonding or forming an emotional attachment with her baby
• Persistently doubting her ability to care for her baby
• Thinking about harming herself or her baby.

The following article, written by our own contributor Joanna Cortes Agnello goes into further details: Recognizing the signs of Postpartum Depression.  

According to research, counseling/psychotherapy should be the first line of treatment for Postpartum Depression. The American Psychological Association also recommends counseling as the initial treatment method for PPD - Treating Postpartum Depression.

The following are a few mental health tips for mothers of toddlers (these same tips can be applied to mothers of newborns!) provided by our very own Joanna Cortes Agnello - 7 mental health tips for moms of toddlers. 

Remember, you are not alone, reach out as soon as you need help, and happy parenting!  

Lastly, we leave you with a message of how you can bring more joy into your life with laughter! Knock, Knock... Who's There? It's me, Happiness!

Successfully Navigating Social Situations

Our focus this week will be Social Anxiety (& how to successfully navigate social situations). According to Thomas A. Richards, Ph.D. the Director of the Social Anxiety Institute, "Social anxiety is the fear of social situations and the interaction with other people that can automatically bring on feelings of self-consciousness, judgment, evaluation, and inferiority." https://socialanxietyinstitute.org/

Social anxiety is much more common than previously thought, social anxiety (used to be known as social phobia) is the third largest mental health care concern in the Unites States. Social anxiety can be overcome, just entails some persistence and consistency and we will go over some useful ways in which this can be accomplished.

You can start with the small things - say hello to whom you make eye contact with during the day, ask people for the time (more than once in a day), say thank you and please every time possible to those around you. By honing in on etiquette, it can be used as a tool to overcome social anxiety by starting small, and by use and practice, your social skills will improve. 

Add a social task per week on your to do list - hang out with a small group of friends or even just a couple of friends somewhere outside of the home, talk to your siblings, interact with coworkers outside of just what is necessary to get the work done. Try and add some social interaction each week. Join a group - it can be a support group, a book club, a sport - building in that social structure into your weekly/daily/monthly life can be a great way to overcome social anxiety. 

Be up to speed on current events, read about current events, having something to talk about can be a great asset in navigating social situations successfully, even with those you may not be close with like family and friends. Knowing what is happening in the world will help you keep a hold on the conversation without feeling out of place. 

Dressing in a way which makes you feel good will also help in interacting in social situations. Once you feel good about yourself, even in outward appearance- can give a boost of confidence and may ease a social situation. 

Make social interactions a priority on your to do list, make sure its at the top and it gets done. The more you do it, the more practice you get, the better you will become at it and the easier it will be. More is better in this instance. The more you practice, the more results you will yield which will become more incentive to continue improving social skills.

Building Confidence

"Health is the greatest possession. Contentment is the greatest treasure. Confidence is the greatest friend." - Lao Tzu

We will be building upon last week's positive self talk onto this week's building confidence, as positive self is certainly a step towards building confidence! 

Perception is everything when it comes to building confidence. The way in which you view yourself has much to do with how others perceive you. Of course there are factors that are beyond control always, but there is much that is under your control and by getting in that driver's seat and taking control, you can certainly build greater self confidence. 

"As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe 

The trick is to not let one set back keep you down, the more you keep pushing on, whether it is a failed test, lost job, or the end of a relationship, the idea is to keep pushing through, and moving forward. Allowing yourself "blunders" and letting yourself be human will not only build resilience within you but make you more confident along with it. The best way to learn is to try and to keep on trying until you do learn. The more you allow yourself to keep on trying and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, the easier it will become to face the next challenge with confidence.

Pulling from last week > be optimistic! Regardless of the situation, social, work, school, etc. being positive is a great force that has the power to change the way you see your outcomes. Try being optimistic the next time you face a personal challenge and see how if your outlook has an impact on the challenge and also how you perceive it. It doesn't cost a thing and it is another step in the direction of building confidence. 

“Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.” - Peter T. Mcintyre

Be prepared for it all. Pay attention to the small details, floss, get enough sleep, eat wholesome meals, dress in clothes that make you feel good - whatever your style maybe, get some exercise regularly - take a walk around the block, and be social - talk to your friends and family. Practicing self care can prepare you for building that confidence. 

Don't accept failure: the sky will not fall down, you will only gain experience by trying. You become stronger and your chances of succeeding increases. Get to know who you are and what you want out of life and the only way to do this is by trying and getting out of that comfort zone. It will build great confidence. 

"Low self-confidence isn't a life sentence. Self-confidence can be learned, practiced, and mastered--just like any other skill. Once you master it, everything in your life will change for the better." - Barrie Davenport

Get to know yourself better - go exploring, figure out what excites you and do it. Doing will help you figure out what you want out of life. It will build confidence, the more you do, the better you will get. As with everything, and as we have mentioned before, practice, practice and practice again. 

Be a superhero. Not in the crime fighting sense (unless that is your job!) - but pose, pose as a superhero for a few minutes in front of the mirror and see how it increases your self confidence, do it before a presentation or a meeting. This too will build confidence. 

Positive Self Talk

The self talk habit is one that is often solidified in childhood, whether positive, negative or a mix. Then over the years this - self talk - tends to color the way we live our day to day lives, from every event we experience to every decision we make. However, the good news is that we can change it anytime we want, and now is a better time than any to change and create a more positive self talk. Not only will having more positive self talk boost productivity but can also help with increased self-confidence and more stress relief. We will present a few strategies with which one can create more positive self talk in one's life.

First, you can begin with noticing the patterns: once you are more conscious of your internal dialogue, it will become much easier to navigate through the thoughts and alter them. 

One sure way of tracking such activity is by keeping a journal: you can carry a journal with you and make a note of self talk throughout the day, or write out a summary at the end of the day, whichever is preferable; journaling can surely provide great insight into the internal dialogue taking place daily to later analyze and make changes. 



Second, after you are aware of the internal dialogue, you can begin by changing the negative internal dialogue to a positive one. 

One method of accomplishing the above is by incorporating milder wording: in your self talk, replacing emotionally charged words with milder versions of them can help in neutralizing the feelings, for instance - instead of using words like 'hate' or 'angry' - you can use words like 'dislike' or 'annoyed'.

Another way of combating negative self talk is to change it to neutral or positive self talk: if you find yourself having a negative thought, for example - having plans cancelled last minute to something you were looking forward to can seem negative initially, but think of what you can do with the new free time you've gained. So, if a negative thought or event takes place that kicks off the negative self talk, attempt to think of a positive that combats the negative in that situation (and once you pause to think of them, they will be there).  

An additional method is to change self-limiting statements to questions: self-limited statements can be damaging to self-esteem and confidence and can also cause stress. Next time a thought that comes across your mind that may go something like the following: "I cannot do this!" and "This is impossible!" change it to "How can I do this?" and "How is this possible?" will turn it into a more hopeful situation and open up more possibilities, which in turn, can help in reducing stress and boosting confidence.

 Positive affirmations can be incredibly helpful solidifying a more positive internal dialogue. These positive affirmations can be desired outcomes and goals and short and focused. By repeating them and even reading them out loud with emotion will make it that much more powerful and can give way to a new set of beliefs, creating a more positive internal dialogue.

Focus on enjoyable moments: while challenges and difficult times are inevitable, the enjoyable moments come as well- and to hold onto those memories and thoughts and focusing on them can aide in creating a more positive outlook overall. You can choose to fill your mind with positive images, in fact, you can choose to do a fun project to make it a point to focus on the positive once, at least every day with the following - https://100happydays.com/

Lastly, practice, practice and more practice! The more you practice in changing the self talk to a more positive one, the better you will become at it, just like exercising any muscle of the body can make it stronger, changing the brain and mind act similarly and require practice!

Goal Setting

Today we will be focusing on goal setting. Many of us feel as though we are drifting through the world and often times, this feeling arises from not having thoroughly thought about what we want. In order to set a destination, first, we need to think about where we want to go and of course how we wish to get to the destination. By setting goals we can achieve what we want in life, to a small daily task all the way to what we want our lives to look like 5 years to 10 years down the road, whether its related to career, family, health, leisure, creative, etc. Below we have provided 5 ways of how to begin setting goals. 

1) Set goals that motivate and are few in number: by sharpening the focus on a few goals that motivate one can help greatly in achieving them. If one is not motivated by the goal, or the goal does not fit in the bigger picture then it may become irrelevant and therefore possibly could cause one to lose motivation. To make sure that the goal is motivating, write down the why for the goal. 

2) Make the goals "SMART": using the SMART mnemonic is a very useful way of tailoring the goals to what one desires to achieve. There are a few variants on SMART, in addition to the standard listed on the photograph, the following alternative may apply to SMART as well: 

• S - Significant
• M - Meaningful
• A - Action-Oriented
• R - Rewarding
• T - Track-able

3) Write down the goals: cannot be stated enough, write down the goals! There is power in writing down intentions and simply seeing it outside of one's mind. The physical act of writing down goals also makes them more tangible and realistic. One other aspect to focus on as one writes theses goals down is to write them positively. Writing them positively will make them that much more motivating.

4) Create an action plan: now that the goals are set and have been written down, one can create an action plan; a very important step which is often overlooked but is essential. After writing each step in the action plan and crossing it off as it is completed, one will see physical evidence of progress which is not only motivating but wonderful for self esteem as one sees accomplishments being achieved and progress being made towards the goal(s). 

5) Review goals frequently: once the goals are written down and one has a vision of what they may manifest as, review them. Review them frequently as this will aid in keeping on track and making the goals a reality. In addition, reviewing the goals will help in creating further action plans to achieve the goals. One can choose how frequently to review them, reviewing them can also help in guiding daily, weekly and/or monthly tasks. 

Making goal setting a regular practice can make one feel motivated, in charge, and even happier. Making progress towards goals can lead to a more happy and satisfied short term and long term life. Attaining the goals can have vast positive consequences in one's life.

Relaxation Techniques

Relaxing - it is absolutely necessary, even if we may not seem to think so in our fast paced, fleeting, daily life. Stop. Breathe. Take a moment to yourself. You deserve it. Everyone has their own way of relaxing, and what one may find relaxing another may find not such that. We have complied some tried and true ways of relaxation. Maybe give one of these (or more than one) a try today! 

1) Autogenic Relaxation - "autogenic" = something that comes from within oneself. This technique utilizes both visual imagery and body awareness. One may imagine a peaceful environment, and then focus on different physical sensations, i.e. a calm heartbeat, easy natural breathing, heaviness of each limb, the temperature of each limb, etc. This relaxation technique can lead to a deep state of relaxation. 

2) Progressive Muscle Relaxation - in this particular method of relaxation, one focuses on slowly tensing and relaxing each muscle group. One way in which one can practice this type of relaxation method is by starting by tensing the toes for 5 seconds followed by relaxing them for 30 seconds, and moving up the body all the way to the head with this manner of tensing and relaxing each group. One can also start at the head and move to the toes if that is more preferable. This relaxation method can help one become more aware of tension in the body and just overall physical sensations. 

3) Visualization - during this relaxation technique, one uses mental images to take a visual journey to a peaceful environment. In this technique, one can use as many senses as possible, sight, taste, sound, touch and smell. For example, imagine a beach, smell the air, taste the salt in the air and the water, feel the warmth of the sun and the coolness of the water, hear the sounds of the waves and the seagulls.


4) Breathing - breath deeply, take a 5 minute break and focus on your breathing, place one hand on the belly, and the other on the chest. Eyes closed, take a deep breath, inhaling deeply and feeling the abdomen push against the hand. Hold the breath and slowly exhale, and repeat. This type of deep breathing for a minutes in a day can lower blood pressure and relieve stress. 

5) Guided Imagery - in this technique, one would listen to a guided imagery CD or another individual guide them into a state of deep relaxation. There are many apps, websites and CDs/DVDs out there to utilize for guided imagery. 

Please see the following links for some quick ways to kick start your relaxation! 
Guided Imagery (on youtube)
Guided Imagery (on iTunes)
https://www.calm.com/
www.stresslesstips.org
10 Tips to help you De-stress

Food & Mood

The food that we consume has loads to do with how we feel daily. There is a delicate balance between our food and mood which can easily be swayed in many directions. Today we will present a few ways in which one can manage anxiety with food. Including the following in one's diet may lead to better management of anxiety via food.

1) Vitamin B - eat food rich in vitamin B or take a vitamin B supplement to ward of anxiety, studies have shown a relationship between mood and the B vitamins. Some food that has vitamin B includes meats, chicken, leafy greens, legumes, oranges and other citrus fruits, rice, nuts and eggs. 

2) Tryptophan - tryptophan is a precursor to the neurotransmitter serotonin, which helps you feel calm. That tired feeling one gets after eating turkey on Thanksgiving - comes from the tryptophan in turkey. Tryptophan in the form of meat has been shown to reduce anxiety disorder. Some food that includes tyrptophan are turkey, chicken, banana, milk, oats, cheese, soy, nuts, peanut butter and sesame seeds. 

3) Carbohydrates - carbs also increase the production of serotonin in the brain. Go for whole grains for brain healthy options, such as whole wheat bread, brown rice and whole grains. Opting for the processed grain alternative can lead to one feeling lethargic due to the sharp increase in energy due to the insulin rush followed by a quick decline. 

4) Omega-3 fatty acids - there is some evidence that indicates omega-3 fatty acids can be uplifting and improve moods. Some food that has omega-3 fatty acids include salmon, sardines, mussels, anchovies, tuna, lake trout, herring, and mackerel. In addition, omega-3 fatty acids may reduce risk of heart disease. 

5) Protein - protein helps stimulate other neurotransmitters (norepinephrine and dopamine) both of which have shown to improve alertness and mental energy. Some food that has protein include Greek yogurt, fish, meat, cheese, eggs, nuts, beans, soy and lentils. 

6) Potassium - potassium naturally helps lower blood sugar and is great for brain health and anxiety. Food that has potassium includes avocados, sweet potatoes, bananas, clams, winter squash, milk, soybeans and orange juice. 

7) Magnesium - magnesium helps with over 300 enzyme systems in the body which regulate diverse biochemical reactions. In addition, it aids in blood glucose and blood pressure regulation, all of these factors make this mineral a very important one in managing mood. Some food which have magnesium includes Swiss chard, spinach, leafy greens, almonds, peas, broccoli, flax-seed, tofu, cashews and bananas. 

8) Curcuminoids - curcuminoids are antioxidants found in turmeric which have been found to enhance mood and have a neuroprotective factor. One can cook with turmeric as an added spice in their dishes. In addition, one can take a curcumin supplement.

9) Dark Chocolate -  dark chocolate may lower levels of stress hormones; cocoa has been found to be rich in a class of antioxidants called flavonoids which have been linked to a number of health benefits. A small piece of dark chocolate is not only satisfying but also beneficial! 

10) Tea - several teas have natural calming effects on the body. Chamomile tea for instance has shown to significantly decrease anxiety symptoms in just a few weeks. Green tea has an amino acid L-theanin which has been shown to curb a rising heart rate and blood pressure, which in turn can lead to a calming effect. Rooibos tea also known as the red bush tea has many great properties including zinc, copper, magnesium, calcium and potassium, all of these have been shown to reduce anxiety and aid in managing overall mind and body health.